The Harvest Goddess Stories

I wrote a book that is 798 pages long. I decided to post some stories from the book here. I hope you like them.

Book 1:Island Of Happiness

Chapter 1

Sunny Island used to be a very poupluated place. But when the Harvest Goddess vanished, so did the people. The buisnesses closed and the people moved away. Only some stayed. About three people or so. The Harvest Goddess left because of a reason. Once the town was filled with people things got bad for her. No one cared about her. Some gave her things she didn't like. So she left. The island became a ruin since the Harvest Goddess left. People moved away due to the island's condition. But there is one person who can bring the Harvest Goddess back. Thus, bringing more people. This is the story of Chelsea.

I rushed to the boat so it wouldn't leave before I arrived at the docks. I was tired of the city and decided I needed a break. I arrived at the boat and gave the sailor my information. I went inside the boat quickly as I could and went to my room. I went outside to the deck of the boat. "What a beautiful day. I can tell by the sky that there are no clouds in sight. I can't believe my luck." I said gracefully.

The trip didn't go well as I expected it would. That night there was a storm. The lights went out. By the time I knew it, the boat got striked by lighting. I fell into the water and felt the water currents take me away.

Chapter 2

"Wake up. Wake up!" I heard someone say.

I woke up and saw an old man staring at me. "Oh good. You're awake. My name is Taro. Me and my family got shipwrecked on this island. The boat must of sunken by now." Taro said looking out to the sea.

The boat was gone but Taro told me that everyone got on the lifeboats safely. Taro introduced me to his daughter, Felicia, and his grandchildren, Natalie and Elliot. I decided to settle down on the abandoned ranch. The house was nice and sturdy but small. It took some time to get used to it.

A few days later..............

After some days have passed I met some new villagers to settle down on the island. I met Chen, Charlie, Gannon, Eliza, Julia, and Mirabelle as the newcomers. On Spring 16th I met Vaughn. He was very quiet when I met him. It all started out like this. Vaughn knocked on my door. "Can I come in?" he said.

I opened the door and saw his eyes looking at me. "My name is Vaughn. I am the animal trader for Mirabelle. I just came to say hi. That's all." he said.

"Nice to meet you Vaughn. My name is Chelsea." I said.

"Well I should be going now." he said walking away.

He left all of a sudden. It happened all too fast. I knew that somehow he needed to brighten up.

Chapter 3

I planted many crops and sold them. I paid Gannon to build the bridge to the meadow. I got an animal shed and a bird shed. I was gettiing used to this place. Vaughn visited on Wendesdays and Thursdays. Today was a Wendesday. I went to the beach to fish for a while. I looked back and saw Vaughn with his head on his arm looking at the horizon. I looked back straight at the water. I had caught 5 fish when I got a big bite. The fish was pulling hard. The fish was strong enough to pull me into the water. I became unconcious as soon as I fell into the water. I was falling to the bottom when I felt someone pull me out. I didn't want to open my eyes because I didn't want to see myself in heaven.

"Are you ok?" I heard someone say.

I opened my eyes and saw Natalie and Felicia looking at me. "Oh good. You're ok. You really got us worried. Luckily Vaughn was there or else you'd still be down there." Natalie said.

Vaughn had saved me that day. I blushed not being noticed. Felicia handed me a bowl of warm soup. "This will help." Felicia said.

I thanked Natalie and Felicia. When they left, I finished my soup and got out my diary. I wrote in my diary about that day. I closed my diary and lay on the bed. I held the diary to my chest. "Am I in love?" I asked myself.

To be continued............

Wait for Chapter 4 soon.

Hmmm. Not bad. I'm interested to see where you take this.

However, I am noticing some things that could hinder to improve your flow. For example, in Chapter One, second paragraph, "I said gracefully" doesn't really make a whole lot of sense in the context that you used it in. You really need to watch the adjectives you use; they can skew a story like *snaps* that.

Also, in Chapter Three, first paragraph, you started two consecutive sentences off with "the fish," and "the fish" is used in the sentence before as well. It's a little repetitive.

The gist of the story feels a bit vauge and rushed to me, especially with Chelsea falling for Vaughn nearly immediately, but I like the story. You should definitely continue. ^^

Apparently my cousin didn't edit the book yet but you wanted me to post some stories. My cousin edits all the books I write and prints them out for me so I won't have to write them again. She has some thing that you put the book in and the computer starts printing out the pages. I'll take the book to her so she can edit it. If only I noticed those mistakes. A 798 page book takes a lot of time. I guess I rushed to finish the book along finishing the mistakes. I'll have my cousin edit it when I visit her this Friday.

Just trying to give some positive criticism. ^^ I'd still like to see you continue this series.

Criticism? Hmmm. Here's the next part anyway......

Chapter 4

The next day I did my farm work as always. It was tiring but worth it. It was a sunny day so I let my animals out to graze on the fresh green grass. A newborn chick that barely hatched stayed near me all the time. I held the chick in my hands and petted her. I watered my plants and picked the ripe vegetables. Taro came over to talk to me about something. "I see you're doing great with the ranch. Keep up the good work to make this island prosper. I've also come for a favor. Can you please tell Gannon to build the bridge to the forest? I really need access there. The meadow is nice and open but I liked to be surronded by trees sometimes." Taro said.

"That's a good idea Taro. I'll just need to get the things for the bridge to have it built. I'll also need the money besides the material. But I'll work on it." I said to Taro.

I worked that day for the materials and money. I needed 500 pieces of lumber and 10,000 gold. It was a lot but I was able to handle it. The bridge was built and Taro thanked me a bit too much. I visited the forest the next day and dropped a strawberry into the goddess pond. The Harvest Goddess appeared. "Thank you for such a wonderful gift." The Harvest Goddess said and left.

I stood there wondering why the Harvest Goddess just left like that. I wondered but nothing popped into my head. The next day someone knocked on my door. I opened the door and saw two people. "Hello there my name is Alisa." one of them said.

"My name is Nathan and we plan to run a church here in the forest next to the goddess pond." the other one said.

"Nice to meet you. My name is Chelsea. A church sounds like a good idea." I said.

A few weeks later.........

True to thier word, they opened a church. It was a nice church and I went there to pray every Sunday. I became good friends with Alisa and Nathan. Summer was just around the corner. It'd be hot soon and I will need to plant summer crops instead now. Mostly the summers on the island had many hurricanes............I needed to prepare for these weather conditions.

Chapter 5

The summer was bad. Many hurricanes were at risk that summer. Taro said that summer was the worse he had been through. Today it was raining. But it was still hurricane summer. The rain poured hard. I sighed and looked out the window. I went outside to feed the animals. I saw something hovering above the ground. It came closer to me. It turned out to be the Harvest Goddess. "The rain is really bad. I just came to thank you for the strawberry. I love strawberries!" the Harvest Goddess said.

Then she left. I went into the barn and put feed in the feeding bins. I went back outside into the rain and went into to the chicken coop. I put bird feed in the feeding bins. I went back outside. I went into my house and put on my raincoat and went outside to walk for a bit. The rain poured down hard I could barely see where I was going. I went to the forest and up the mountain. I went inside the mine where it was empty. Then lighting striked one of the trees. The tree caught on fire! The rain made the fire worse. The fire spread across the ground and further into the forest. The fire seemed to have affected the mine because rocks fell and blocked the mine entrance. I was trapped inside and unable to get out. I heard someone's voice from over the entrance. "It's me, the Harvest Goddess! I calmed down the fire and regrew the trees but I can't seem to be able to free you. I need to find a way. Untill then, stay calm." I heard the Harvest Goddess say.

I stayed in the mine and sat far in a corner. I heard something in the mine besides the silence. It sounded moan-like. I screamed and fainted. Everything else went black. The darkness surronded me. I lay on the ground unconcious. I heard something burst. I felt water around me and I knew that the rocks must of been cleared. I awoke to the sound a voice. "Is she alright?" I heard someone say.

I opened my eyes and saw everybody surronding me. "She's awake!" I heard Felicia say.

"Are you alright?" Lanna asked.

"I'm ok but my head hurts. What happned?" I said rubbing my head.

"You must of fainted due to a headache. Many people faint because of a serious headache. They start hearing things and then faint." Mirabelle said.

So the moan I heard was fake. Just my headache making me hear things. Far in the crowd I saw Vaughn. I blushed hiding myself blushing. "You shouldn't be in the mine when a storm is going on. Something much more worser might happen." Sabrina said.

Later that day I found out I had been fainted for the rest of the day. So I awoke on the next day after the storm. It was sunny. A day better than yesterday. I got back to work. I watered my crops and put feed in the feeding bins for my animals. I went to the meadow to relax for a bit. I felt the air blow around me. I saw Eliza and Charlie playing in the meadow. It seemed like they were playing tag. I saw Vaughn come to the meadow. He put his head over his arm and pulled his hat over his face. I can tell he was blushing. I also blushed and turned away. But that day was different than other days. Later that day I stayed for a little to talk with Vaughn. We both were blushing but we were hiding it from each other. That day I became closer to Vaughn.

Chapter 6

A few weeks later.........

One Thursday, I accepted the invite from Vaughn to the meadow. He had asked me the day before if I could go to the meadow with him to ask me something. "I know we've know each other for some time now but I needed to ask you this before I left." Vaughn said blushing.

I couldn't restrain myself but I managed to hug Vaughn before he said anything. "Thank you for saving me the day I got pulled into the water. Thank you for everything." I said hugging him.

I felt him hug me back. I felt something feathery in his hand as he hugged me. I kept hugging him. "I wanted to ask you if you would want to marry me." I heard him say.

I kept hugging him. "Yes I will!" I said.

A week later..........

The ceremony took place a week later after the proposal. Vaughn and I were married and would live together forever. The Harvest Goddess congratulated me by ringing the bell. The Harvest Goddess was happy I bought more people to the island. I was happy myself.

The End

(Note:Every story in the book has only six chapters. So don't ask why they got married so early)

Book 2 coming soon.

Quote :

crit·i·cism the art of evaluating or analyzing works of art or literature.

"Positive criticism" isn't a bad thing. ^^ A better synonym would probably be "feedback."

Good work! Keep going!

I know what it means. The only thing is I didn't understand how you put it in a sentence.

I was just making sure that you knew that I was only trying to help; a lot of times critique can be taken as an offensive remark.

I didn't take it offensive.

Yeah, sometimes I just have to throw that little disclaimer in though. ^^